Life lessons learned through marriage and counseling.

I have had the thought for a while now to write down some of the things that Joel and I have experienced and learned as a couple.  Our marriage has not been an easy one by any means.  There have been times where where the proposal from Runaway Bride has rung loud and strong, some parts louder than others.

"I guarantee that we'll have tough times. I guarantee that at some point one or both of us will want to get out. But I also guarantee that if I don't ask you to be mine, I'll regret it for the rest of my life. Because I know in my heart, you're the only one for me."

Sometimes it's hard to see past wanting to get out, but 5 years later we're still hanging in there.

For the past year Joel and I have been seeing a counselor.  I started going first because I felt overwhelmed by the emotions that I didn't understand and that I couldn't process.  Emotions from legal battles, working, going back to being a full time mom when I wanted to be working, marriage, family, relationships, mission stress that still bothered me and much more.  

I attended a church women's Saturday conference and one of the speakers was a lady named Jessica Profit. I liked how candidly she spoke and how quickly she could manage topics.  She said a phrase, compound stress. It struck a chord and I wanted to learn more about her.  We eventually made arrangements to meet and things have progressed well since that time.

I started seeing her personally for 4-5 months and worked through many blocks concerning my mission, the legal battles and many other topics.  Sometimes it was how do I manage these sleep battles with Emi napping.  Sometimes it was my own personal battles.

My counselor has been a great asset in helping me refocus on life.  We have learned and been able to implement many new ways of thinking, parenting and living.  Eventually Joel started coming with me because there were things in our relationship that we wanted to improve and address.

Lately I have shared with friends and others that could benefit from knowing that Joel and I see a counselor at times.  I think it has helped changed the way of thinking that "You only see a counselor if something is seriously wrong."

I hope to be able to write and capture some of the things we have learned and how it has affected and impacted us in life, marriage and family.